7 Things To Do On Valentines Day: Keeping It Simple

  Of all the things to do on Valentine’s Day, simplicity is key. This holiday gives a wonderful opportunity to enhance your relationship and build lasting memories. If you’re still trying to decide how to celebrate, I’ve listed seven ideal things to do for Valentine’s Day to keep the fire burning. 1. Flowers Don’t Fail – You can’t […]

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4 Ways to Tell if He’s the Best or Just a Beast  Lorem Ipsum is simply dummy text of the printing and typesetting industry. Lorem Ipsum has been the industry’s standard dummy text ever since the 1500s, when an unknown printer took a galley of type and scrambled it to make a type specimen book. […]

4 Ways to Tell if He’s the Best or Just a Beast

 

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The recent re-release of the Disney classic, “Beauty and the Beast,” illustrates one of the long-standing myths that our culture has about relationships. By that I mean, the arrival of a Prince Charming to lift us off our feet and sweep us away.

 

There is actually a good message in this particular movie – sometimes, those who we think are the beast (because they may not look like a-hunk-of-burning-love) are actually those who are best suited for us. They’re usually the best person for us because they align with what we need; In essence, they are the life-long worthy partner we’ve always been searching for. What I mean is that we, as women, are not always opening ourselves up to the right person because we put emphasis on the wrong things.

 

Here’s what you need to do to make sure you don’t simply settle for less. Remember, just because the guy is kind of cute and you melt when you’re around him…even if you feel the biological clock is ticking… follow the path of wisdom. If you dream about your next blind date as marriage material before you even meet him, then you know you’ve gone overboard.

 

Before you jump into something you assume will last forever, check off some important factors that will impact your future relationship sustainability:

  1. You are compatible. This means you fit together in terms of your morals and values so that you are focused on the same ideals when it comes to decisions you will have to make together, like children, how to raise them, how to handle money, religion and church… etc. Make sure you are on the same road and traveling in the same direction.
  2. Your temperaments balance one another. You don’t have to be the same. That kind of relationship would be boring. However, you do want to make sure you balance each other rather than spend most of your time together butting heads. You want to be like two pieces of puzzle that fit together despite representing different colors and dimensions.
  3. You are both committed to do the work. Make sure your partner wants to put in the same effort as you when it comes to making the relationship work. You don’t want to be stuck with someone who dials it in, or simply bolts at the first sign something needs to be fixed. This also means that during crisis you can work together to find resolution and move forward as a couple.
  4. You are attracted to them. Chemistry is important, and it’s not superficial to consider this as one of the important factors. Think about Belle and the Beast. He wasn’t the handsomest fellow on the outside, yet it was his inner character that she fell in love with. The fact that the spell wore off and he cleaned up pretty well afterwards was just a bonus.

These factors can help you decide what type of investment you want to make. Is it time to diversify and move on or is it worth buying and holding that relationship for the long term? These signs are the indicators you need to make that decision.

7 Things To Do On Valentines Day: Keeping It Simple

 

things to do on valentines dayOf all the things to do on Valentine’s Day, simplicity is key. This holiday gives a wonderful opportunity to enhance your relationship and build lasting memories.

If you’re still trying to decide how to celebrate, I’ve listed seven ideal things to do for Valentine’s Day to keep the fire burning.

1. Flowers Don’t Fail – You can’t go wrong with flowers, because they always make a statement. From a single rose to an elaborate bouquet, flowers communicate love as a public display of affection. For us ladies with a non-traditional flair, we know that this idea isn’t only for us. Some men really enjoy the honor of receiving flowers, too.

2. A Greeting Card – It’s simple, but powerful—especially if you’re not very romantic or good with words. A card can say all the right things in all the right ways. If you’re apart during the holiday, send a card via snail mail. This shows that you exerted effort and forethought. But if you’re scrambling at the last minute, an Ecard will get the job done, and some options even allow you to personalize with photos, video, audio, or text.

Just remember…the greeting card shouldn’t be a stand alone gift. Even if your budget is low, the card could grant its recipient a nice massage or back rub. Be creative!

3. Intimate Dinner – Love is best nurtured through quality time. That’s why this traditional method never gets old. If the two of you are always on the go, it will be great to slow down for the evening, get caught up, and spend some valuable time together.

4. Simply Chocolate – Although they only come once a year, the big chocolate hearts are an all-time favorite. Even if your mate dosen’t like chocolate, the stuffed teddy bear and assorted flavors will get your lover instant popularity in the office.

5. Just Say It! – Sometimes we’re making big, elaborate plans and neglect the power of simplicity. Stevie Wonder said it best, “I just called to say I Love You. I just called to say how much I care!” Texting is great, but saying it is even better. You could even spice things up and learn to say I Love You in another language…Te amo! (Spanish)

Some people believe they don’t have to say it all the time, but some of our mates want to hear these words more than once or twice a year.

6. Call A Truce – If you and your mate have been at war, you should declare a truce. Decide to spend the day without pushing negative buttons or hitting below the belt. The peaceful air will be good for you both.

7. Take A Walk Down Memory Lane – Even though time has a tendency to change the dynamics of a relationship, it’s always nice to remember the beginnings. Try pulling out photo albums or watching your wedding video. Put on some old music, then laugh, smile, and enjoy your shared experience.

We all know how fast Valentine’s Day passes. Therefore, I recommend that you continue to utilize these ideas over the next few weeks and months to come. A good relationship takes work on both parts to continue to nurture the passion between the two of you.

Enjoy,

Dr. Jacquie

America’s Marriage Coach

7 Rules To Follow if You’re Banking on Financial Alignment for a Happy Marriage

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They say that money is the root of all evil. I may not be able to put my moral stake in the ground when it comes to that
statement, but what I do know is that it can ruin many relationships.
Pick any relationship survey where couples are asked what they fight about the most, and cha-ching! Money comes out on top. It may be about not having enough money to pay the bills or it most likely is about how each person in the relationship disagrees on how the household finances should be spent.
He’s annoyed that she’s bought more shoes and she is screaming at him for supersizing their television set. Something that causes so much conflict has to be evil right? Well, for those couples that create financial alignment, money does not have to become a source of discontent.

Here are some tips to help create financial alignment before you walk down that aisle:

  1. Communicate with each other your viewpoint about money. Should you save? What should it be saved for? Should bank accounts be merged or kept separate? Should each person have pocket money? Who will pay which bills? Get agreement first as this will serve as the ground rules for how you will govern the household finances.
  1. Create a budget and live by it. Be sure to regularly review the budget to see if anything needs to be changed.
  1. Ask before spending. This doesn’t mean treating each other like children by getting the other’s permission. If anything, this helps each other from potentially spending unwisely on big purchases.

 

  1. Decide on a strategy to maintain good credit. Is there a budget? This will help you spend within your means. It will also determine if there is money left over to buy things you each enjoy.
  1. While you may not always agree on what money should be spent on, make sure there is room in the budget for each spouse to make reasonable purchases that offer him or her individual pleasures. Agree to disagree and let each other indulge here and there on treasured “stuff,” whether it’s the latest fashion or football tickets or a spa treatment or a new pair of headphones.
  1. Discuss your goals and support of each other’s financial worth that each of you may bring to the marriage and what that will mean for other aspects of your life together. For example, if you are both working and building careers or businesses, is the other one supportive and not jealous of the amount of money being brought in?
  1. Remember to be each other’s cheerleaders, because the success and monetary gain from each person’s hard work is for both of you. Also remember that everything that happens in your relationship is seasonal. You might start off being the one with the golden egg, and the next stage of the marriage your spouse might be the one with it. Then, it might flip flop again.
    Before you get married, try to come up with agreements about all of the above, so that you don’t let money come between the two of you.